CHAPTER EIGHTEEN!
( FROSTED WINDOWS. )

   YOU HAD BEEN forced to pack up your things and leave Welton without a chance to say goodbye to your friends. Your father couldn't comprehend your actions at all, or more to the point, he didn't try to.

You leaned against one of the long windows in your house, staring at the frost on the glass. You'd only been home for a day, but it felt like way longer. It was too quiet here, the quiet felt cold. Not just in temperature, the silence was colder than the frost on the window.

After your father took you into his office and spoke with you about the expulsion like any other business matter, he decided to ground you. That meant no outside contact until they sorted out your schooling arrangements. He also made sure that you knew that you were to never speak to Charlie again. He didn't even know that you guys were dating, but he was sure that being in close quarters with both Keating and Charlie was the cause of his daughter's rebellion.

Every look from your family felt like their eyes were glazed with ice. Emotionless, which was sometimes scarier than anger. This wasn't unfamiliar to you, you'd been convinced you came from a line of Abominable Snowmen for years. It just didn't feel right. You'd lost a friend, but there was never any space to grieve here, and there was never any sympathy. There was never any heartfelt conversation or even any pat on the back. There was no anger for your outburst anymore. Just cold.

You didn't have anyone to talk to anymore, you weren't allowed to use or answer the phone. You'd been standing by windows and staring at the ceiling for hours now. You didn't know where to put all the feelings so you reverted back to keeping them inside like you always had. For a moment you let yourself remember Charlie's warm brown eyes and what it felt like to hug him. What it felt like to kiss him. What it felt like for him to hold your hand and just talk to you.

You knew that you couldn't go on doing things the way you used to because Keating showed you a new way. Charlie showed you a new way that just felt so much better. So you walked over to your desk and pulled out a pen and paper. It wasn't poetry, but you just wrote. You wrote about Neil. You wrote about Keating. You wrote about how much you missed the club. How much you missed Violet. And how much you missed Charlie.

For the first time since you left Welton you let yourself cry. You wanted someone to hold you, and you wanted someone to share your sorrows with. So you just kept writing until the tears made some sentences illegible.

❦

"You'll be going to Ridgeway High, at least for now. We've sorted out all the details with the administration. You'll be starting on Monday. You are to go to and from school every day and nowhere in between, understood?" your father did one evening over dinner.

"Understood," you stated, fighting back a small smile. You would finally be able to leave. That was all that was said, only the soft clinking of cutlery against plates followed.

That evening your father locked himself in his office, saying he had important work to do. You sat in the living room, flipping through a novel you'd ended up stealing from Welton's library unintentionally, yet unapologetically. Your mother was in the kitchen, making some tea and cleaning up.

Suddenly you heard the phone ring. Both yours and your mother's eyes immediately darted towards it. You then made eye contact with her as she answered the phone slowly.

"Hello? This is (Mother's Name) speaking," she paused and turned back to you. "Yes, she's here, just a moment." Her eyes flicked to the top of the stairs then back to you. She motioned to the phone and you jumped up quickly. You grabbed the phone and pulled the cord so that it reached to the pantry where your father wouldn't be able to hear.

"Thank you," you whispered to your mother. She only nodded and continued her work. You shut the door and held the phone to your ear.

"Hello? Who is it?" you asked. You then realized that you hadn't weighed the possibility of it being Mr. Nolan or the administration of Ridgeway High. You just assumed it would be one of your friends. The feeling of worry was washed away when you heard Charlie's voice on the line.

"Guess," was all he said. You almost started crying right there in your pantry.

"Charlie," you smiled, clutching the phone tighter.

"I called the school, they ended up telling me that you were expelled too," he explained. "Never been prouder of you," he laughed. You grinned, wishing you could just see his face. You missed that laugh.

"Oh, also, you mind explaining to me why you were never available to talk? I've called everyday but your always quote-unquote 'busy'," he stated, sounding sad.

"I think you know why. I'm not allowed to speak to anyone, especially you. My father pretty much considers you a juvenile delinquent at this point."

"Juvenile delinquent, huh? Well I do like the sound of that," he chuckled lightly. Then there was a long pause. His laughter stopped and he breathed into the phone quietly.

"How are you?" he finally asked. "I mean, really?"

"Awful."

"Me too."

"I- I just miss Neil," you started, "I miss you. I miss Keating. It's just so lonely here, and I just feel like- like I don't know what to do about anything. It's not enough, it's not enough to have yelled at Nolan or my father. It's not enough to be told that it'll all work out. I miss him. I miss you Charlie, I really, really do," you cried. It didn't feel like your words made any sense.

"I know, I know. I miss him too. And I miss you. God, you have no idea," he replied. Another pause. You could hear slight sniffles on the other side of the speaker.

Then Charlie spoke again. "I'm not allowed to leave the house either, but my dad missed the phone loophole, I guess yours didn't."

"Nope. But what about school? What's that gonna look like for you?" you asked, trying not to let yourself hope that you'd see him on Monday.

"Oh, I almost forgot, my dad got me into Ridgeway. He talked to Chet's dad, apparently it's a pretty good school. Originally he was gonna make me go out of state, but Chet's parents said something that must've convinced him to let me stay here," Charlie explained.

"Well, looks like I might not have to suffer through school without you then."

"You're going to Ridgeway too?" Charlie nearly shouted.

"You should probably keep it down, but yes. I start on Monday," you struggled to keep your voice down.

"Well, me too," Charlie said, and you could hear his smile. You could feel his tears too.

Three quick knocks on the pantry door let you know that you had to hang up. You held the phone a little tighter.

"Look, Charlie, I have to go. I have to go, but I'll see you soon. Goodbye," you whispered the last word.

"I really wish I could kiss you right now," he replied. "Okay, goodbye."

You listened to his soft breaths for a few more seconds before stepping out of the pantry with tear stained cheeks.

You put the phone down and made eye contact with your mother. She almost said something, but didn't. Your father's footsteps on the floor above you reminded you to quickly sit back on the couch. He descended down the stairs and eyed you suspiciously as you tried to appear to be reading, even though your mind was elsewhere.

"Why are you crying? What possible reason could you have for such weak display of emotion this late in the evening?" he asked accusingly. Emotion was always so suspicious to him. You wondered for a moment if he had ever loved your mother.

"Sad chapter," you stated, offering a moment of eye contact. He moved over to the wooden chair beside the fireplace where he too grabbed a book, only his was something about law. He found novels and poetry a waste of time, but that was expected.

You flipped the page to avoid suspicion but just kept thinking about Charlie. About Monday.

❪ ⋆࿐໋ 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒑𝒆 𝒅𝒊𝒆𝒎. ❫

AUTHOR'S NOTE.

So this is where I planned to take the fic after the plot. There's only a few more chapters left and then I'm probably just gonna hardcore edit it. Anyway, thank you SO MUCH for your support, it means the world to me.

- s.